DcAnan.msg

{100}{}{You see a short man with a thick mustache.} {101}{}{You see the Great Ananias.} {102}{}{You see a short, mustachioed, man with a somewhat furtive look to him.} {103}{}{You! What do you want to do to the, formerly, Great Ananias now?} {104}{}{Get away from me!} {105}{}{Go ruin someone else's business.} {106}{}{Take it out on someone else.} {107}{}{You've already done your worst to me.} {108}{}{Just go away, you've done enough harm to me.} {109}{}{I'm so hungry.} {110}{}{How will I ever feed my family now?} {111}{}{You were born with a heart 12 sizes too small.} {112}{}{No, my friend, a MUMMY! Straight from the sands of ancient Egypt to the sands of the Wastes! Exclusively for you to see!} {113}{}{OK, I'll bite. How much to see the wizened corpse?} {114}{}{(too yourself) Hmm, a mummy would kinda describe the way a ghoul looks. OK, I'd like to take a look -- how much?} {115}{}{I've seen enough corpses already. Goodbye.} {116}{}{Hello, welcome, salutations! I am the Great Ananias (he offers you a slight bow, with a flourish). I bring mysteries from near and far friend. Mysteries from a world beyond our own... of the Netherworld.} {117}{}{Come back to learn of the Great Ananias' mysteries of the Netherworld have you?} {118}{}{What kind of mysteries?} {119}{}{Uh, nice to meet you Mr. Great Anus...something.} {120}{}{Hmm, mysteries make me sleep uneasily, I better go. Goodbye.} {121}{}{Step right up!} {127}{}{Today, in the room within, I have, for your eyes exclusively...A Jan-u-wine Egyptian Mummy!} {128}{}{A mummy?} {129}{}{A mummy? Hmm, I wonder if it could be.... No, nobody could be that stupid.} {130}{}{I don't have any interest in that sort of thing. Corpses scare me.} {131}{}{Out of the way, you're blocking paying customers.} {132}{}{I don't think this is for you.} {133}{}{Why don't you take your little tribal self elsewhere.} {134}{}{This isn't really for you.} {135}{}{I see, hmmm, how about GO (he points) AWAY!} {136}{}{For a person of your obvious class I would be happy to show this unique, and historic, specimen to you for a mere $25.} {137}{}{OK, I'll cough up the dough. Now...Show Me The Mummy!} {138}{}{I don't want to spend that much. I think I'll survive without seeing the thing. Goodbye.} {139}{}{Simply open the sarcophagus lid and the marvelous Mummy will be revealed, in all its ancient glory, to you. But please, no touching, and, uh, no flash photography.} {140}{}{Great.} {141}{}{There you go! The MUMMY! (the door to the sarcophagus swings open to reveal a desiccated corpse, that looks very much like an ordinary ghoul, standing in a poorly painted, chipped and cracked paper-mache sarcophagus.)} {142}{}{There you go! Presenting, the MUMMY! (a crypt-like door swings open to reveal a jan-u-wine Egyptian mummy standing in an open sarcophagus that looks as though it's made out of pure gold!)} {143}{}{Hey, wait a minute. That's not a Mummy. That's a ghoul. WOODY! Hey WOODY! Is that you?} {144}{}{That sure looks like a ghoul to me.} {145}{}{That's a mummy? I can't believe I just paid $25 to see a six-foot hunk of jerky. Goodbye.} {146}{}{Wow, that's fantastic...I guess. (you look at the Mummy very intently for a while). Uh, thanks, Goodbye.} {147}{}{(the Mummy, snorts, stretches languidly, and then looks at you with a sleepy blink to it's eyes) Hello. (he says, sleepily)} {148}{}{Holy shit! That *is* Woody! Run Woody, run for it! Well, uh, gimp for it then! Go Woody go!} {149}{}{I assure you that the Mummy is, in fact, quite jan-u-wine.} {150}{}{I don't think I believe you. Let me try something. WOODY! Hey WOODY! Is that you?} {151}{}{Well, if you say so. But I sure think it looks like an ordinary ghoul. Goodbye.} {152}{}{(Woody--for it is in fact Woody, not a Mummy, that stands somewhat drowsily before you--grabs the sides of the paper- mache sarcophagus, lets out a shriek and runs for the door, leaving a trail of toilet-paper 'mummy-wrappings'  and a hasty "Thankee kindly, Stranger!" behind him.)} {153}{}{Hah! I knew it! You're finished in this town. You're not the Great Ananias anymore, you're just another ass.} {154}{}{Go Woody go! Ahah! I knew it!} {155}{}{(The Great Ananias shrugs) I knew I should have picked up that mono-headed Brahmin instead. Oh well, back to the drawing board.} {156}{}{Mono-headed brahmin? Sure, who would ever believe that! Goodbye, you Charlatan.} {157}{}{You woke up Woody the ghoul and freed him from indentured mummy-tude.} {158}{}{I think I'd rather hear the ghost story.} {200}{}{I know things that mere mortal man is not meant to know. Aiiieeee! Nyarloth...Oh, sorry (heh, heh). Got a little carried away there for a moment. I have tales of a Ghost that haunts these very grounds, as well as a Jan-u-wine Egypt-ee-an Mummy that you can see, right here in this marvelous sarcophagus.} {201}{}{Tell me about the mummy. I'm just dying to hear more about that.} {202}{}{I've just got to hear that ghost story. Uh, do I get a nice hot cup of cocoa to go with it?} {203}{}{I don't think I have any more time to waste on whatever it is that you're hawking.} {300}{}{Well, you see, (he motions you closer) there was once a great queen that ruled all of the surrounding town. She kept her throne by virtue of a special amulet that she kept around her neck at all times. Great stuff, huh?} {301}{}{Uh, yeah. You bet. So this princess had a *magic* amulet. Oh, do go on. I just can't stand this level of suspense much longer (yawn).} {302}{}{OK. I think I've heard just about enough. Goodbye.} {400}{}{Well, I'll cut to the chase then. So, the evil wizard poisoned the young princess and took her amulet. She's been wandering around the room next door ever since. Well, uh, that is, just at the witching hour, anyway. That's why I keep the door locked. Pretty darn scary, huh?} {401}{}{The ghost of an amuletless princess in the trashed room next door? That's it? I can't believe you're peddling *that* as a story. I'd rather hear about this stupid Mummy you're supposed to have here.} {402}{}{OK. I think I've heard just about enough. Goodbye.}