NcComedi.msg

{100}{}{You see a comedian.} {150}{}{You see a crappy stand-up comic. He's nervous, and it shows.} {200}{}{He's too busy in his routine to talk right now.} {1000}{}{So... uh... why did the radscorpion cross the road?} {1001}{}{To get away from your boring ASS!} {1002}{}{I say we kill this guy!} {1003}{}{Cause the radscorpion... uh, it wanted to get away from the radioactive fallout particles...} {1004}{}{You suck!} {1005}{}{FUCK YOU!} {1006}{}{Uh, the joke, see, since it was already a mutant, it didn't need to cross the road, so... uh...} {1007}{}{} {2000}{}{Heh-heh. Gecko... ghouls, right? Ghouls...man, do they STINK.} {2001}{}{You stink!} {2002}{}{This guy should only be on Saturday nights!} {2003}{}{Uh... heh-heh... so, uh, ghouls right, they smell bad. So, like, uh...} {2004}{}{Did I mention ghouls stink?} {2005}{}{Um, so I find this ghoul, right, I ask, 'Are you guys envious that I don't stink?'} {2006}{}{He goes, "No. Uh, why do you ask?"} {2007}{}{I said, because you're GREEN.} {2008}{}{Uh... green with envy. Get it?} {2010}{}{Booo!} {2011}{}{} {3000}{}{So... there was this prostitute, right, this stupid slut...} {3001}{}{Your Mom's a slut!} {3002}{}{"Slut?" I'm going to stab you to death after the show!} {3003}{}{And... uh... she goes, right, she goes, 'is that a Gecko in your pocket or are you just... uh, horny?'} {3006}{}{Uh... did I mention it was a fire-breathing Gecko...? Heh-heh.} {3007}{}{} {4000}{}{Vertibirds?} {4001}{}{Verti what?} {4002}{}{What the hell is this guy talking about?} {4003}{}{How about those little bags of peanuts they serve on flights?} {4004}{}{How about the salami you get served?} {4005}{}{What's... up with that?} {4006}{}{} {5000}{}{Optional traits?} {5001}{}{*Yawn*} {5002}{}{You know, like jinks. Anybody seen these lately?} {5003}{}{Anybody seen your pencil dick lately?} {5004}{}{Uhhh... Do you think that there is anyone who says, "Hey, I think I want more critical failures?"} {5005}{}{Who... are these people?} {5006}{}{Hey, I've heard that one somewhere before.} {5007}{}{} {6000}{}{Radscorpions?} {6001}{}{What's so rad about them?} {6002}{}{It's short for RADIATION, asshole.} {6003}{}{Who are these people that think mutated scorpions...} {6004}{}{Are so rad?} {6005}{}{You suck!} {6006}{}{} {7000}{}{Molerats?} {7001}{}{Oh boy...} {7002}{}{What's up with these things?} {7003}{}{Are they moles...} {7004}{}{Or...} {7005}{}{Are they RATS?} {7006}{}{And what about pigrats?} {7007}{}{What is up with that?} {7008}{}{Uhhh... yeah, what is up with that?} {7009}{}{} {8000}{}{Super mutants?} {8001}{}{Does this asshole ever stop telling these stupid jokes?} {8002}{}{What's so SUPER about them?} {8003}{}{When was the last time you saw a super mutant...} {8004}{}{Get a cat out of a tree?} {8005}{}{Never! Know why?} {8006}{}{*Yawn*} {8007}{}{Uhhh... because super mutants don't rescue cats...} {8008}{}{They kill mercilessly!} {8009}{}{Wish someone would kill you mershssmbl...} {8010}{}{So who calls them SUPER mutants?} {8011}{}{Who are these people?} {8012}{}{Probably the same idiots who hired you!} {8013}{}{} {9000}{}{And what about that dork, Myron?} {9001}{}{Is he talking about me?} {9002}{}{I mean, what a geek! It's like he's lived in his parents' basement ALL his life.} {9003}{}{*Ha* *Ha* *Ha*} {9004}{}{Hey!} {9005}{}{Well, Myron, you ARE a dork.} {9006}{}{Don't worry about it, Myron. He's just trying to be funny.} {9007}{}{Yeah, you're just lucky I don't kick your ass, pal!} {9008}{}{} {10000}{}{So did you hear about the stupid Bishop daughter that got knocked up?} {10001}{}{*Clap* *Clap* *Clap*} {10002}{}{::Whistle::} {10003}{}{Amazing!} {11000}{}{Heh-heh. Did you hear the one about the tribal who wiped out the Enclave?} {11001}{}{The tribal was sooo stupid that, uh, the tribal, right... uh, blew up their rig.} {11002}{}{BOOM!} {11003}{}{Did I mention the tribal was stupid?} {11004}{}{You're the one who's stupid!} {11005}{}{}